You know, our acting business is as much emotional work as it is strategy and craft.
In order to have the success you want, it’s about facing all of it head-on and not hiding from any part of you or your career.
So, I have to ask….Do any of these sound familiar?
- Something good is going on for you and you make sure you kill it, consciously or unconsciously.
- It’s time to stand up for yourself, but instead, you bow down and do nothing.
- You fight for something you really want and when you get there, you manage to destroy it somehow.
- Sometimes you feel hopeless, helpless, overwhelmed or shameful.
Greetings! You, Self-Sabotager, you.
Look we’ve all been there. Self-sabotaging is tricky because you’re destroying your dreams without even knowing it.
Here are two tips you can do now to ensure you’re not self-sabotaging yourself.
Tip #1: PAY ATTENTION
I invite you to think about what you’re doing and why. Though you might not know you’re self-sabotaging – there is always a choice and an action in that choice.
By paying attention you will begin to notice the “why” behind your actions.
For example, your actions might be:
- You don’t email back the person you like who emailed you a super sweet email
- Your friend calls and you don’t answer the phone even though you’re sad and could really talk to someone
- You isolate when things get hard as opposed to reaching out
You might start to notice a pattern of retreating.
Ask yourself – WHY are you retreating? Is it perhaps to avoid intimacy? Maybe you’re afraid of vulnerability and true connection?
Pay attention to your choices and action, in there you will find the root cause.
When you get to the root cause, you can change.
Tip #2: Stop Appeasing other people
Another reason we self-sabotage is we care too much about what people think!!!
We want to be liked. We want to be perfect. We don’t want to look stupid.
So we self-sabotage in small ways, to NOT put our asses on the line because we’re afraid of what others might think.
Ask yourself, am I taking this action because it serves me or my ego? Oof. This stuff is getting real.
If it’s serving your ego, I guarantee you it’s because you’re too focused on how you look instead of achieving what you really want.
You get to be willing, to be honest with yourself and uncover the truth.
Look, there are a million little ways you self sabotage. By paying attention and making your vision bigger than what other people think, you can begin to eliminate your old patterns one at a time. You just get to be consciously intentional.
